And yes, i know the blog title is outdated by like a whole 2 years. I ought to have thought about time when i decided on the blog title.
But well, time passes so fast especially the last 6 months that i felt i've grown 6 years. A lot of it is attributed to -- motherhood.
Pregnancy, Labour and Meeting my new born… what an overwhelming lot of emotions, physical changes, mental and spiritual volatility.
Suddenly, flashbacks of those moments come to mind.
1) when hub drove me to the hospital that fateful night to start my inducing, which i thought would end rather fast, or the most half a day….
2) when i had to de-gown, had inducing pills inserted into me
3) when i had to have this pill inserted so that i can pass motion, and then to have it hold in my .. er hmmm.. for XX seconds before i'm allowed to run to the toilet like some mad cow.
4) when i had to be put on oxytocin drip as the inducing was not going as well as expected even tho my contractions were happening fast and furious
** by the way, baby is awake and thankfully able to just lie in her cocoon bed hiccuping so that i can eternalise my thoughts.
5) being pushed to the delivery room thinking that it's going to happen and just to realise it's a long wait. and then i had laughing gas as the contractions were giving me pain but not enough for me to warrant an epidural.. * on hind sight, i wonder what happened should i have asked for it right from the start.
6) that surreal moment when i was inhaling the laughing gas and had the epidural injected into me…. i was like transcending to and fro time, with the voices of people around me alternating back and fro and as tho i was in some black hole / vacuum which i was desperately trying to get out. Sad thing hub was not beside me and he was at dinner when i kinda hope he was around, but prob a good thing as it would freak him out if he has seen me hallucinate which is what i concluded i went through as the anaesthetist said i was shaking my head even though he kept asking me not to Move. * which i did hear!!
7) the horrifying news when i heard the baby's heart beat started dropping fast every time i went through contractions and that i was still a long way before my cervix was 10 cm. And it's best that i go for caesarean ( emergency).
8) of course the rest is history, i knew the baby had to come out some how, signed the papers, and even joked in the operating theatre during the 20 mins procedure from going into the theatre to getting baby out. The stitching part took out almost twice the time.
9) Looking my baby for the first time and holding her with Hub. Our little family of 3.
10) Staying in hospital for the next e days in our private 1- bedder with hub around, and having baby pushed to me every 2 hours for breastfeeding..
And that's another story.
I gotta play with baby now as she needs my attention.
