I thought I really need to declutter my mind.
You know how you feel somewhat "stuck"? Even if everything is going kinda smoothly. Nothing major to complain, nothing major upsetting, but just can't quite put your finger on it.

I don't know if I'm alone. So I'm just trying this mode to see if it works by just furious typing out whatever comes to mind, no second guessing, no doubting if it makes sense, if it's ok.

Here goes:
a mum of 2. A loving hub. supportive family, decent job that pays well.

Perhaps it's having too much things in life. Too much material stuffs, that's also eating up my mind.
Been finding myself reading about buddhism and parenting.
Buddhism and mother.
Zen.
Impermanence
Clearing my mind
Simplicity
Joy

when it comes to imaging. the few things will surface
1. white
2. lines
3. wood
4. water
5. Pebbles
6.Green
7. Green
8. Light

( credit to the link post)

very zen looking stuffs. I see it as a need to seek inner peace. thoughts. the need to be still.

At the same time, I know what's my problem.

Information overload from :
Social Media
Facebook

Nothing quite constructive. It's as though my brain constantly needs feeding, if not it will die.Starvation.

That's totally not healthy, and when it comes to health- I worry about
My flabby tummy but I'm not doing anything about it. for now I want to clear my mind first.

Technology has made us smarter. So smart we don't even need to walk to our phone to check our messages. I can download what app desktop and receive messages On my Mac. I don't need to go to the bank. I can transfer money via my mobile. e- payments. Another topic for discussion, especially with the government intending to go e-payment island wide even at schools.  ( primary schools).

You know what? I am feeling little better.

It's like lighter.  I'm not too sure if I'm describing it right, but I felt my boxes are kinda aligned. So I watched this clip how the comedian described man and woman's brain function differently.

Men- their brains are like boxes. A box for this, a box for that. And the best part - The boxes never touch.

Women - their brains are like wires, network. Everything connects to everything. That's what I think I kinda just demonstrated above I guess.

And strangely, my brain is being emptied, and I don't feel so flustered internally anymore.

And from the start of the post till this point in time, I have also taken the liberty to "read" all the unread emails ( from those gmail, by simply clicking them as "mark as read"-- why bother accumulating when I'm not going to read them, and feel so burdened by the increasing number that pops up in the red balloon whenever I check my phone?

And maybe it's things like this which I think doesn't bother me, but subconsciously does. And it makes me feel ineffective looking at those "numbers" those red bubbles, because somewhat it reminds me of a checklist that's not done.

Then again, it might just be the very fact that I don't have a checklist that's making me so "unfulfilled". If only my vocabulary is good enough that I can pin point down to the exact word that mirrors my current state of mind.